i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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