if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
