theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
