She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
