But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
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i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
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No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
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