I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Randomize