I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
