I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
