I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
