fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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