would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
