And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
