I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
