I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize
