I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize