ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
why is half of my head shaved?
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