Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
