Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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