the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Randomize
