Christians are straight up FREAKS
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
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