YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
not ubering you a puppy
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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