If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
