So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
