3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
