we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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