Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
