I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize