Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
