Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
