Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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