Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
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