I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
