If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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