My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
