Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
