To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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