Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
