Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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