so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
