If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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