apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
