Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Randomize