She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
The Olympian is in my bed
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
