Jerry, you need to find god
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
