the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
