he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
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