i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
3 2 1 whiskey
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
