Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
