trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
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