Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize